For crying out loud stop talking about babies Lula.

I think I need to make little cards for everyone exempting them from having to listen to me boring on and on about babies. I think I might start to lose friends. I'm starting to bore myself.

But the thing is, when you're this big, all you really can think about is how moving around is much more of a hassle than it should be, you're knackered all the time, you hurt - Oh the list is endless.

And then there is the whole birth thing - don't even get me started on the birth thing unless you have a tissue handy, I get so angry and ranty and tearful. It is frustrating ands annoying that the western world seems to treat birth as if it is a difficult, medical issue that always goes wrong and is fraught with problems. It is hard to believe that women have been having babies since time immemorial when the thought of a big baby sends the whole medical world into a big spasm of panic. Oh my god, the baby is a bit on the large size, no birthing centre for this mother.

In this country it is the law that a woman can demand to have her baby anywhere she likes and a midwife must attend. I could demand to have my baby in a phone box if I felt like it. But apparently I can't have my baby in the birthing centre, because my baby doesn't fit into their statistical average measurements. Because my baby is big I have two choices, have it in the delivery suite and labour on the labour ward, or have it at home.

But wait...I wanted to go to the birthing centre because it is 'halfway' between home and hospital. It is reassuringly still a little bit medical, but mostly comforting and relaxing. How can it possibly be safer for me to have my baby at home? Of course if you ask western medicine they'll say it isn't, some hospitals still call home birth 'child abuse' but they have to let me if I want to.

And I think I do want to.

I cenrtainly do not want to labour on a ward full of other labouring women, feeling like I'm ill in hopsital and then get shifted to a delivery suite where they are hurrying you up and timing you and monitoring the baby constantly. Statistically women are much more likely to have interventions (forceps, episiotomies, etc) in hospital than they do at home. At least at home you can take your own time and manage as you see fit your own pain, there is no-one pressuring you to be quieter, to have an epidural.

That said, two of my friends have had hosptial births and caesareans which went really well for them. Oh, it's so confusing.

So there's the thing.

I'm open to opinion and discussion on it.