A Simple Yet Apparently Necessary Lesson On How To Get Your Cat Fed Whilst You Are Away.

A. Do do this:

You: Call someone and have the following conversation:

You: Hello. Will you feed my cat when I'm away?
Potential cat-feeder: Of course. From when till when?
You: (Specify dates)
Potential cat-feeder: Lovely, see you soon then. Bye.

Result: Cat gets fed, all are happy.



B. Don't do this:

You: Leave a message on potential cat-feeder's phone and assume they've got it.
(N.B. Especially don't do this when potential cat feeder is depressed and therefore renowned for not checking their phone messages.)

Potential cat-feeder: Doesn''t get message for four days, then feels awful about enforced cat starvation.

Result: Cat starves for 4 days, all feel bad.



Lesson Number Two.

On discovery of non-cat-feedage, don't do this:

1. Find out cat hasn't been fed and blame non-feeder. Non-feeder does not know he/she was non-feeder since no feeding was requested (as far as he/she knows) in the first place.
2. Blame all other people related to non-feeder, just because they should have telepathically known you had gone away and telepathically should have made non-feeder go and feed cat.
3. Spin Doctor all further reports on conversation to make out non-feeder relation does not give a shit about cat and in fact sends random and horrible text messages related to cat, without regard for cat, cat's well-being, or indeed away-ness induced hunger.

Here endeth the lesson.