Since I have not been able to skate (around mid-March) I have put on about a stone in weight, because cake + no derby = maximum storage.
As a direct result of this extra weight, I feel horribly unattractive and want to hide and I don't want to get my body out at the gym or anywhere that people who don't know me might see me. I don't even want my husband to see me and he's already said he loves me in all my seasons, fool that he is.
With nothing to do (or rather nothing I can cope with doing which involves exercise) I stay at home and find other more gentle, nurturing things to do. I am very good at cooking.
I cook, therefore I eat.
Standing at the cooker, cooking when you know you shouldn't be is a demoralising, horrible, loathing feeling of failure; a lack of willpower and spinelessness. Often there is cheese. If there is cheese then I will eat it.
Therefore I get fatter.
Therefore I feel horribly unattractive and want to hide and...hang on....
I seriously do not know how to extricate myself from this.
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